Kundalini Yoga and I after Yogi Bhajan
Where do you turn when everything you trusted has been blown to bits?
Where do we start when talking about Kundalini Yoga & Yogi Bhajan?
Back in 2007 I fell in love with Kundalini Yoga.
I found the practice (or did it find me?) through my degree studies and a health & wellness channel on TV. While channel hopping one day I stopped on a gorgeous looking Yoga practice which looked mystical and fascinating.
It was a global teacher named Maya Fiennes and with the beautiful music, weird and wonderful movements had my curiosity.
Then whilst reading about Sikhism, the word jumped out at me again ‘Kundalini Yoga’!
So I responded to the universe and gave it a try.
Within 3 minutes I was a convert.
The peace and ‘high’ that I had always heard others talk about, but had never experienced, was suddenly mine for the taking.
I felt calm but energised, relaxed and excited, meditative and powerful – all the things.
Kundalini Yoga and Yogi Bhajan
Yogi Bhajan, a sikh man, took Kundalini Yoga to the US in 1969. He taught it to thousands of people and encouraged them to share the practice with others.
It is a profound and powerful practice, and rather like Marmite, you love it or hate it.
Through his teachings he founded the 3HO organsiation which focuses on sharing the art and accompanying lessons with the world.
The teachings are great. They make sense and are so wise. As I delved deeper into Kundalini Yoga, and subsequently went on to train as a teacher, I would often turn to his teachings and wisdom for guidance.
I trusted him.
I trusted his word.
Then the Truth Comes Out
When I was a child and I went to Sunday School, I always questioned why we believed this guy Jesus so much.
I remember thinking ‘what makes his words more important than someone elses?’
And I kept that mindset with Yogi Bhajan.
I chose what I took and left the rest.
I never stuck completely to Kriyas (gasp amongst the teaching community) because I gauged it on what my students needed that day.
I drank alcohol, ate fish, ate dairy, didn’t practcie sadhana every day, but I did let his words guide me when I had no where else to turn.
So when the allegations came out in early 2020 (yes it has taken me this long to write about it) I thought ‘what the f**k!! Can I trust no one?’
Basically, it transpires that over many years, it is more likely than not that he sexually assaulted multiple women & children. And the really sad thing is, was that I wasn’t hugely surprised! He was a man with a lot of followers and power.
How could he hold lectures praising the importance and power of women when he was abusing them?
I Lost My Faith in Kundalini Yoga
So I didn’t know what to think. Except that Yogi Bhajan was a total scum bag, I had lost my grounding force, my practice.
I questioned that everything he had taught was a lie.
The kriyas, the pranayama, the meditations – all lies.
My teacher training has all been founded by him and my manuals were chock full of his teachings and lectures. Here I was questioning everything.
I Had to Find Faith in Myself Again
But, thanks to the pandemic, I got to rethink how I taught.
The truth is because I had never really strictly stuck to his way I didn’t have to change anything, but I did need to remind myself of WHY I practice.
And that is because of the science.
I cannot question the way my life flows so much easier, or how my mind is brighter when I practice Kundalini Yoga. The science and my own feelings prove that I cannot function well without it. It still grounds me and keeps me safe. The technology is around 2500 years old through Raj Yoga, It has nothing to do with Yogi Bhajan.
My Kundalini Yoga and the way I practice is my own. It flows through the feminine energy within me to guide and light up others.
There is certainly life in Kundalini Yoga today and as we move into a new era of honesty, openess and spirituality, I am proud to be a part of this female empowering movement.
I am an Actress, Kundalini Yoga Teacher, Children’s Yoga Teacher and Mama. As the founder of The Mindfulness for Children Project, I enable parents, teachers and any care giver to share mindfulness to children and teenagers.
My passion is ensuring that women are able to practice their self-care and enjoy their spiritual journey, allowing it to effortlessly fit into their lives. That is why I created the It’s All Yoga Online studio, a spiritual toolbox for women all over the world.
Plus my signature online course The Divine Goddess Yoga Program enables women all over the workd to make quick, swift transformational changes to live their life on purpose.
